Tips to Address Amateur Equestrian Anxiety

The biggest hurdle in amateur riding anxiety is simply allowing yourself to make mistakes and embracing them as data for growth. If you aren't making mistakes, you're probably not learning.

Lately, my social feeds have been flooded with one common theme across articles, forum posts, and discussions: the nervous amateur rider.

I see posts describing crippling anxiety, stomach-churning fear before a lesson, and the difficult situations these feelings create for both the rider and the horse. It breaks my heart because I know how much joy this sport can bring, and I see so many talented people stuck in a loop of fear.

Here’s the thing: I get it. I was there. My younger self was an anxiety-ridden mess, convinced every small mistake meant disaster.

I have a specific memory: When I was 20, I took my green horse to a major national horse show. During an under-saddle class, my anxiety took over completely, channeling straight through to my horse. I uncontrollably lapped everyone in the class, over and over again, while my trainers ducked their heads in shame at the rail. I let my panic dictate the entire ride.

But now? That fear is gone.

And the reason I ride with confidence today isn't some secret talent or magical horse (although Vino is quite the unicorn). It’s because I learned a simple, profound truth: It is all changeable, and each and every one of us has the power to control it.

The Internal Loop That Creates an Anxious Rider

The breakthrough came when I was given some powerful advice, advice that applies to the mental game of riding more than anything else:

Your brain doesn't necessarily always believe what is true. It believes what you repeat.

In other words, your brain is a pattern-seeking, highly obedient servant. If you constantly feed it signals of panic, failure, and self-doubt, it will dutifully translate those into the very real physical feeling of anxiety in the saddle.

This creates a self-fulfilling prophecy, a four-step loop we often don't even realize we're running:

1. Your Thoughts Shape Your Feelings: "I’m going to fall off." $\rightarrow$ You feel panic and stiffness.

2. Your Feelings Drive Your Actions: Panic $\rightarrow$ You grip the reins, clamp with your legs, and tense up.

3. Your Actions Become Your Identity: The horse spooks because of your stiffness, reinforcing the thought: "I am a nervous rider."

And just like that, the label sticks.

You Are Not a “Train Wreck Dumpster Fire”—You Are a Determined Adult Amateur Equestrian

The good news, the truly revolutionary news, is that your brain is constantly rewiring. Who you are—your identity, your confidence, your relationship with your horse—is entirely changeable.

The key is to stop repeating the negative script and start creating a new, evidence-based narrative. Instead of telling yourself you're a "nervous amateur" or a "train wreck dumpster fire," let’s choose a different approach to directly address anxiety.

Tips to Address your Anxiety Head On:

Here are the mantras you need to repeat until your brain accepts them as truth:

1. Reframe Your Identity

Stop identifying with the fear. Use language that speaks to your effort and commitment.

• Ditch: "I am an anxious rider."

• Embrace: "I am a determined rider."

• Embrace: "I am committed to learning."

2. Mistakes are Data, Not Disaster

In riding, mistakes are inevitable. A missed distance, a dropped lead, a refusal—these aren't moral failures; they are moments of learning. If you don't make mistakes, you aren't trying hard enough to grow.

• Ditch: "I messed up again. I'm terrible at this."

• Embrace: "Every ride is a learning experience."

• Embrace: "That mistake is a learning. Learnings help me become better."

3. Perfection is a Myth; Effort is Real

We put immense pressure on ourselves to be perfect in the saddle, which is impossible with a 1,200-pound animal who has a mind of their own! Let go of the need for flawless execution and focus on showing up mentally and physically.

• Ditch: "I have to be perfect today."

• Embrace: "We don't have to be perfect, we just have to try."

  
  

When you repeat these statements, you stop fueling the anxiety loop. You start fueling a Growth Loop:

• New Thought: "I am determined to learn today."

• New Feeling: Purpose, calmness, focus.

• New Action: Breathing deeply, giving clearer aids, staying present.

• New Identity: I am a confident, capable, and determined equestrian.

Taking Control: Your Brain Needs a New Script

Your horse needs you to be the calm, focused leader you are capable of being. Give your brain the script it needs to make that happen. Start repeating the positive truth about yourself today.

And one final, crucial step:

Stop focusing on all the articles and posts that affirm your confirmation bias that you are a nervous wreck—because you are not.

You are a determined rider. You are a learning rider. Now, start repeating that until your brain believes it.